Growing up

Spend in pure converse our eternal day;
Think each in each, immediately wise;
Learn all we lacked before; hear, know, and say
What this tumultuous body now denies;
And feel, who have laid our groping hands away;
And see, no longer blinded by our eyes.

-Rupert Brooke

I came to the conclusion that a person never realizes how much he has grown as much as when he read previous writings of his; journals, blogs, personal emails, etc.

There is no better proof of the things I did that I regret and things I said that certainly shouldn’t have been said. Things that seem trivial now meant so much before and I just wonder how silly and self indulgent I was.

I look around me and I see people, especially young women, living very superficial lives and I tried to make more of my life, but after reading my history I realized that I might not have been superficial but I still was not the person I thought I was; I didn’t live up to the image (not physical!) I had of myself.

I guess that is what growing up and learning is all about, you know more today that you did yesterday and hopefully less than what you will tomorrow, or as Lincoln said it "I do not think much of a man who is not wiser today than he was yesterday". I know today that I’m not the same person I was six months ago, and that scares me because it makes me wonder who is the person I’m going to be next year?

This was like a wakeup call to remind me that every single decision I make today, is going to shape my future, whichever path I choose to take today, every hour I was I can’t rewind.

"I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I --
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference."

-Robert Frost